6:00 AM

Monday will mark my 3rd week of school and something like my 5th week of pursuing intentionality. It really only took until the Thursday of my first week of school to realize this was going to be harder than I thought.

Last semester, I had Economics at 8 am, so I would wake up 6/6:30 to leave the house an hour later. I didn't really have any problems waking up and getting going in the morning which was almost a semi-miracle for me. Now, Spring Semester '11 is upon me- marked by the ever-cheerful neon orange parking sticker- and at 6 am I am glued to my pillow. I had very excitedly scheduled my first class of the day at 9:30. This way I could continue waking up at 6, like the previous semester, but be able to fit more into the morning before school. I have 3 hours to have my quiet time, walk with my mom, get ready and take care of any chores/leftover homework. This should leave me incredibly thankful and springing out of bed when my alarm goes off at 6am. It doesn't.

It was once pointed out to me that morning when we first wake up holds the most potential for sin- in the form of selfishness- than any other time of day. This makes sense when you think about it. Often the first thought to enter my head when I wake up is something along the lines of wondering where I am and why on earth is that obnoxious alarm going off? I proceed to hit the snooze with a vindictiveness the alarm must feel offended at- it is just doing its job-and grumble in my mind about it still being dark and being the first person up and having to go to a boring class and there not being any coffee made and having to actually get up at all. All this happens in less than a minute, and before the sun has even risen I have engaged in selfishness, grumbling and complaining and laziness. And I pride myself with 'beginning' the day with my quiet time?

What occurs between the minutes of 6:00 and 6:01 am seems very hopeless. Most the time I can not even remember what occurred in the first 15 minutes of my day very clearly, let alone take any of those thoughts captive. However, the Bible makes no exceptions: it does not say "Take every thought captive, with the exclusion of the first 15 minutes you are awake because that tends to be extremely difficult." Ah, no. It requires every thought to be taken captive. This, like anything, takes practice. Lots and lots and lots of practice. It has been 4 months since I have become aware of this habit and I have maybe managed to wake up being thankful for the day twice. Quite pathetic actually. All it should take is waking up and being grateful I actually have a bed to sleep in, that I had a full nights sleep, that I am privileged enough to continue my education when there are many that can not, and that there is even coffee to brew. And overall being thankful for new mercies every morning and the grace of Christ I carry with me throughout the day.

Though I know waking up is going to be a struggle I will face throughout this semester, I take heart in 2 things: 1.) The joy I have experienced in these last two weeks through the time I spend with God in the morning and 2.) William Law and George Mueller. Firstly, by the time I have a cup of coffee in hand and have laid out my Bible and journal in front of me I am already thankful that I didn't hit the snooze button 2 more times. By the end of my hour, it is apparent to me the time I was able to spend pursuing my relationship with Christ and knowing Him more was infinitely more worth than the extra half hour I could have slept in. Though as we all know, there are those days where it really did not seem worth it and the extra half hour did. This is when I take encouragement from two men, William Law and George Mueller. In John Piper's book When I Don't Desire God, he quotes both these men frequently in the chapters on prayer. These are the two quotes that have encourage me most:

" When you thus begin the day in the spirit of religion, renouncing sleep, because you are to renounce softness and redeem your time; this disposition, as it puts your heart into a good state so it will procure the assistance of the Holy Spirit; what is so planted and watered with certainly have an increase from God. You will then speak from your heart, your soul will be awake, your prayers will refresh you like meat and drink, you will fell what you say, and begin to know what saints and holy men have meant by fervors of devotion." William Law

I bristled a bit when he referred to sleep as "softness." I understand Mr. Law is not referring to a good night's sleep as softness, but rather to the excess of sleep I dearly crave. After all, who would consider the half hour from 6-6:30 excess sleep? I call it being a student- isn't that what everybody does? Regardless, Christians are not called to be "everybody else," but Christ-like. I'm not saying we all have to wake up at a specific time, everyone has different seasons of life and different schedules and different requirements to be met. We are each accountable to how we utilize our time, though. For me this means making sure I am in bed between 10-10:30 pm. Let me clarify that 11 to 11:30 is staying up late for me on a week night. While I understand this freely allows you to label me as an old woman, I also understand that going to bed any time after 10:30 makes it all the harder to fight the urge to sleep at 6 the next morning. I have made it a goal to attempt to cultivate the desire to be in the Word early in the morning rather than in my book late at night. For this undertaking I am spurred on by this last quote of George Mueller's:

"According to my judgement the most important point to be attended to is this: above all things see to it that your souls are happy in the Lord. Other things may press upon you, the Lord's work may even have urgent claims upon your attention, but I deliberately repeat, it is of supreme and paramount importance that you should seek above all things to have your souls truly happy in God Himself! Day by day seek to make this the most important business of your life."

My current thinking is that I need to order these last two quotes in the form of neon signs and flashing lights, to be attached to the ceiling as the first thing I see when I wake up. But something in me says continuous exposure to bright colors and blinking lights may result is seizures at a young age, so maybe I won't. The Holy Spirit is better than any neon sign, so I need to learn to let Him mold my will to staying awake rather than falling back asleep. So raise your coffee mugs to those early morning minutes of supreme and paramount importance and let the adventure begin.